Tag: Humor
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Mahoney’s Microfiber Towels Memo: RE Anti-Semitism
DATE: November 20, 2022 TO: All Staff FROM: Titus Mahoney III, CEO SUBJECT: Anti-Semitism The recent anti-Semitic comments and views promoted by Kanye West and Kyrie Irving are troubling. In harrowing times it is important to stand for humanity and support those under attack. It is also important to let our consumers know where we […]
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Oh No Conversations: Edibles
Oh no…I just started a conversation with a man who just recently ate edibles. This conversation never changes. The beats are as consistent as the sun rising each day. Yup, he just brought it up unannounced. I asked about his sick mother. Instead, he is convinced I need to hear about his latest edible adventure. […]
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5 Pro Tips for a Healthier Work Day
Maintaining a healthy lifestyle at work can be difficult, especially if your job requires you to stay seated at a desk. When the work days are busy, health and fitness can be easily forgotten. Thankfully, there are ways to combat the busy work days and stay committed to your health and fitness goals.
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Lettuce: The Ultimate Superfood
Maintaining a healthy lifestyle and diet can be difficult to accomplish. Every day there is new information and new trends appearing online promising an easy path to your dream body. If you still haven’t found a suitable diet for your lifestyle, search no more. The answer and power lie in a superfood vegetable you’ve known […]
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“Bones” is Ruining my Relationship
My girlfriend, Abigail, is very dear to me. We have been dating for almost seven years and our relationship grows stronger each passing day. Not even two years spent in a long distance relationship could inflict any damage to our love for one another. However, the popular streaming service Netflix yields a more deadly blow than being […]
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Happy President’s Day?
Happy President’s Day! Or something like that. Before today, nobody truly cared about President’s Day. The holiday was simply an excuse for a three-day weekend. Trump’s presidency has ignited protests every week since he’s been in office. Trump and his administration are so controversial that people took the time to organize “Not My President’s Day” […]
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Buffalo Bill’s Valentine’s Day Advice
Hi. Hello. My name is Jack Gordon. Others like to call me Buffalo Bill, but to be honest, I’m not too fond of the nickname. I don’t like westerns. The women in those movies had no taste, always dressing in dark colors. Not to mention that they were rail thin. So, anyway, please call me Jack. Valentine’s […]
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Super Bowl LI: Bad for My Health
Last night’s Super Bowl made me so sick, that after the game I stuck my head into the oven. No, I’m not an Atlanta Falcons fan. Nor did I want to commit suicide. At least not yet. Instead, I wanted to complete my gluttonous night by snacking on post-game triple chocolate fudge brownies. Which after […]
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How My Relationship Fell Apart
Relationships are too often finite. The early seeds of an intimate relationship can blossom into the most beautiful and mesmerizing bouquet of flowers, only to wither away, succumbing to destructive forces, both concrete and abstract. The small possibility for the flowers to persevere and overcome these toxic monstrosities is what makes the desire to fall in love an […]
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Spice Up Your Email Signature with these Quotes
Professional emails are vital to maintaining a healthy and favorable work relationship among colleagues and peers. Most people get hung up on how to start an email, but the most crucial element of an email is the signature quote. The signature quote is critical because it’s the last phrase read, serving as both an extension of one’s personality […]